August 25, 2009
I first wrote this blog back in 2009, but I have made some changes and added more of my thoughts to this blog. I hope you enjoy the new and improved version.
In some companies they say ‘drive depth.’ They say ‘depth is security.’
Here is the more traditional comment. “You need to network with the right people.”
The deal is they are both the same comment.
The key to building a business is networking or driving depth with the correct directions.
For this article depth will be the term used from here on out. The depth levels you drive down in need to be done with purpose and direction. The quality of your driving will determine the effectiveness of your efforts. Just like in driving to a vacation destination, if you make all the right turns you will get there faster, safer and cheaper.
You get a quicker ROI and much better ROI for your family because you arrive at the destination quicker and start to enjoy your investment of time.
Here I want to start to provide improved decision making skills & directions for more effective driving depth. As always your ability to ask questions is the key to evaluating turns you make. To learn better question skills I suggest reading the BOOK: The Aladdin Factor, by Jack Canfield & Mark Victor Hansen.
The next step is to learn to keep you antenna up and looking for opportunity and know what you are looking for. It is NEVER a mistake to look for the sharpest 3 people one contact knows. An example is if you know an attorney, the question needs to eventually be; who is the sharpest attorney you know? If he gives you someone, then you know a sharper attorney according to his or her criteria. So the key is to ask the right questions of the person you are dealing with. Another example is if you are …
Ask at home. Ask at school. Ask at work. Ask at restaurants. Ask at gas stations. Ask the world. Ask yourself. Ask God.
Why do people hesitate or fail to ask? In The Aladdin Factor, they give five barriers or reasons why people don’t ask for what they want.
Let’s think about this barrier. Most people don’t know what to ask for. We either don’t know what is available, or we are so lost that we don’t know our real needs. Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “Fear always springs from ignorance.” When we don’t know to ask, we get exactly what we asked for. Maybe your parents never taught you to speak up and ask questions. Maybe they taught you the opposite, and wanted you to sit still and be quiet like a little, scared mouse. If you ask a question and do it in a manner that is respectful, what is the worst that will happen? You might hear a crushing “no,” but nothing bad is going to happen when you ask a genuine question. The best way to get better at asking questions is by practicing and asking questions.
Limiting and inaccurate beliefs.
When you get a new computer, it runs like a well-oiled machine. Programs and documents open quickly and easily. Life is good. Then, two years later … you are ready to throw the thing out a window. It locks up. It runs slowly. It’s a mess. All you want is a new computer. You are similar to a computer. When you were born, your brain was a blank hard drive, ready to be filled with information. As you get older, you are like that computer. You forget details. You become set in your beliefs too. After being inquisitive as young people, we start to think we know it all. Ouch! That last nugget stings doesn’t it? Make the effort to pretend you don’t know what you don’t know. Be open to learning. Even if you think you know, ask to find out for sure. We get conditioned by our world. You have to work to be open minded for the long haul. We learn at school, through media, church, etc.
Why do we let fear cripple us in so many ways? Why do we listen to what other people say and, even worse, listen to their words. Fear makes us passive. We lean more to standing on the sideline rather than getting our butts in the game and playing the game like we mean business! Stop worrying about what people think, how you look, etc. Get up in there. Play the game!
This is a big one. Too many people believe they are not worthy of the finer things in life. They don’t believe they should have the dream life they see on television. We doubt ourselves and our talents, when we are capable of more than we realize. Why do people think they are not important? Why do they then, in turn, think other people are more important? This is crazy to me. The most important person in the world is you, and you should think that way. If you don’t think that way, who will?
Stop worrying about rejection. Think big. Act like you belong. Believe that you are a winner. That’s how winning starts happening. You must believe it!
Here’s one that is tough to swallow too. Many of us, men for sure, let pride get the best of them. We refuse to stop to ask for help! We don’t ask for directions. We don’t seek sound advice. If we do, we don’t listen. Why would you ask a person for their input and not use it to your advantage?
A lot of people don’t want to seem weak or needy. No human has ever gotten through life without help. It doesn’t matter if they are homeless or millionaires, they had help along the way. Again, why do people worry about what people will think or say? Here’s something you have to know: you can’t please the world. It is not possible.
Let’s drop the pride and ego, and seek help. We can do more if we have help too. Let people who are willing to help you, help you!
Work on improving in these five areas. I bet if you do that, you will enjoy a richer, more fulfilling life. I believe in you, and you should too.